Real Love

I've learned how to be quite efficient over these past several years. When I became a single, self employed mom, I had to learn how to cram a lot into one day. It took me a while, but I finally learned how to get the absolute most out of each day, sometimes having to schedule everything I did by 15 minute increments. It's crazy when you have to schedule not only work but also things like driving time, laundry and showers.  When I can see on paper, though, everything I need to do, I'm more likely to get it all done. Those were some busy times.

Now that I'm married again and have TWO kids (everything past one increases the workload exponentially, I have learned), busy has gone to a whole new level. While I don't often have to live by written schedule anymore, I still never stop moving. Even with my husband by my side helping and working with me, I still never stop moving. There's always something to do, always someone who needs something (kids, clients, mom, etc.). And while I'm doing one thing, I'm always thinking about what I need to do next. I guess I'm still making schedules. I've just learned how to do them without paper.

Many moms survive by being efficient. It certainly has become a way of life for me. Imagine, then, my shocked surprise when I read these words written by Paul E. Miller in Love Walked Among Us.  After describing Jesus' compassionate raising of a widow's only dead son in Luke 7:11-17, Miller says this: "Jesus' tenderness suggested to me a new, less "efficient", way of relating. Love, I realized, is not efficient."

I knew when I read those words that they were true. I've been thinking about it ever since. All you have to do is study the life of Jesus to see what real Love looks like.

Real Love is work. It takes time and sacrifice. You can't schedule it. You can't have a plan, because Love is unpredictable. Love can be scary, because you never know where it will take you. Love stops to look and always sees the other person as a person and not just as a problem or an interruption. Love will get your hands dirty. Love doesn't always get appreciated. Love might lead you to lonely places, but that's okay, because you will always find Jesus there. Love gives the best that it has and trusts God to do the rest.

I've really been thinking about my own life and how it relates to this not-so-efficient idea of a Jesus kind of love. I used to be really good at compassion. Now, I realize, I've become so busy being efficient that I often lose opportunities to show this Jesus kind of love to people - including my own husband and children. The Bible does not say "Now laundry, field trips, and being on time abide; but the greatest of these is being on time."  No, it says "So now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love." (1 Corinthians 13:13) Jesus said in John 13:34 "A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another." 

Wow. Jesus gave it all. He gave it all, even when it made Him late. Even when it made Him hurt. Even when He is right, and I am wrong, He still loves. Even when it's my own fault, He has compassion. Even when I am impossible to deal with, He still shows patience and kindness. And when I come back to Him, tearful and sorry for the 1000th time, He still meets me with open arms. That's how He has commanded me to love others. I think I might need to get un-efficient and learn how to get busy loving.

Father, thank You for showing me that Love takes time. Thank You I can do all things through Christ, who strengthens me. (Philippians 4:13) Help me to learn from His example in Your Word and also in my life. Teach me again how to slow down and do the hard work of real Love.


In His perfect love,
Amy

copyright 2012, Amy Wallace